Two years without a home to call my own has been uncomfortable for a home body Cancerian crab of my nature. Moving clear across the globe and uprooting over fifteen years of my independent stake as a resident and citizen elsewhere is a total upheaval hard to prepare for - much less contend with.
As this tsunami of change swirled within - the outer world squeezed and closed in - tighter, smaller, meaner. Spots of sunshine and delight grew farther apart, dimmed significantly, needed more effort to come by or sustain.
How to feed that inner core, pour back into it some replenishment? Keep the big picture in focus, see it clearly, not let externals rub or rob it of its shine. Manage flow and progress so momentum is not impeded or halted, derailed or depleted.
So much more is expended under unfavorable conditions than when there is full, fresh, firm love all around. Soft, tender, allowing grace - not noise, obstacles, judgement. That makes all the difference in the world.
Although we clearly want one and not the other its isn't always the case. Going where the river flows has the ease and expansiveness that struggling against the current does not foster. Seeing oneself through the filter of loving kindness is vastly removed from harsh heavy horridness.
We love the most the one who loves us the most and we shrivel where love is withheld or absent. That's the truth.